If you’re the parent of a child with Special Educational Needs (SEN), you’ve probably asked yourself more than once: Am I doing enough? Am I doing the right thing?

The truth is, you’re not alone – and getting the right support can make all the difference. Private tuition, when tailored to your child’s unique strengths and challenges, can be a transformative step. This guide will help you understand what to look for, what to expect, and how to make choices that work for your child and your family.

1.  Understand Your Child’s Needs

Before searching for a tutor, take stock of what you already know.

Things to gather:

• School reports or progress updates
• Educational Psychology assessments (if available)
• EHCP documents or SEN support plans
• Notes on what your child enjoys and avoids when learning

Even without formal paperwork, your insights and observations as a parent are incredibly valuable.

2.  What to Look For in an SEN Tutor

Great SEN tutors come in many forms. Some bring years of experience, while others bring fresh energy and a flexible, student-led approach. What matters most is that they understand your child and are willing to tailor their support.

• A thoughtful approach to your child’s specific needs – whether grounded in experience or fresh perspective
• An openness to using (or learning) specialist strategies where appropriate
• Flexibility to adapt and individualise sessions
• Warm, empathetic rapport and good communication
• Willingness to collaborate with you, school and other professionals

Tip: Try an introductory session to see how your child responds. The right fit often comes down to connection, not just credentials.

3.  Questions to Ask a Potential Tutor

These questions will help you get a feel for whether the tutor is the right fit for your child. Whether they have years of experience or are bringing a fresh, open approach. The most important thing is how they respond to your child’s individual needs.

Questions you might ask:

• How would you support a child like mine, who has [insert your child’s specific need or challenge]?
• How do you plan your sessions and what happens if my child is having a difficult day?
• If my child becomes distracted, anxious or resistant, how would you respond?
• What does progress look like to you and how will I know if things are working?
• Are you happy to keep in touch with me, and work alongside my child’s school or other professionals?

You don’t need the tutor to have all the answers straight away, but you do want someone who listens, thinks carefully, and genuinely wants to understand your child.

4.  Session Survival Kit: What Helps on the Day

Set the stage for smoother, calmer sessions with a bit of preparation.

Helpful tools and tips:

• Ensure there is a quiet, organised workspace ready for the session
• Have fidget toys on hand or brief the tutor on the need for sensory breaks
• Introduce a short break before the session to your child’s routine to reset (a walk, music, snack)
• Create visual “Now/Next” boards or have a visible session plan or agenda (so your child knows what’s coming)
• Introduce a mini reward system (like stickers or free choice time)
• Have a way to reflect afterwards: quick chat, voice note, journal note, or even just a thumbs-up/down

Tip: Have a teen?  Involve them in setting up the space and the structure. Giving them a sense of ownership can really help with buy-in and focus.

5.  “What If My Child Refuses?”: Handling Resistance

Even with the right tutor, there might be days when your child simply doesn’t want to engage – and that’s completely normal. Refusal isn’t failure; it’s a sign that something feels hard, or that your child needs a different approach that day.

Here are a few things that can help:

• Stay calm and curious: “What’s making this feel tricky today?”
• Give your child some control: “Would you rather start with reading or take a quick break first?”
• Ease into it gently. Sometimes a chat, a walk, or even just sitting together gets things going
• Keep the session short and positive if needed: 15 minutes of success is better than 45 of frustration
• Afterwards, focus on what did go well, even if it was just showing up

Many children grow more open to sessions once they realise it’s not just “more school” – it’s support that’s truly for them.

6.  Planning for Success: Setting Expectations

When you’re starting out with a tutor, it helps to be clear about what you hope your child will gain and it doesn’t need to be academic straight away. Share your priorities early on so the tutor can shape sessions around what really matters.

You might say:

• “Right now, I just want them to feel more confident when reading aloud.”
• “They’re very anxious, so a calm, positive relationship is the main goal to begin with.”
• “It would be brilliant if they could start asking for help rather than shutting down.”
• “Focus and stamina are big challenges – we’re working on building that up slowly.”

Let the tutor know that you value emotional wins as much as academic ones. Small steps in self-esteem, independence or resilience are often the biggest indicators that things are moving in the right direction.

7.  Three Small Wins to Celebrate

One of the most common questions parents ask is, “How will I know if this is working?” Especially when your child has had a difficult relationship with learning, progress doesn’t always show up in test scores or neatly ticked boxes – at least not straight away.

Instead, look for the subtle but powerful signs that your child is starting to feel safer, stronger and more capable.

Three early wins to notice:

• They try something hard instead of shutting down – even if they don’t get it right, they stay with it
• They say something positive about learning – maybe just “that wasn’t too bad” or “I liked that book”
• They want to share what they’ve done – showing you their work, mentioning something from the session, or even asking when the next one is

These moments might seem small, but they’re not. They’re signs that your child is beginning to trust the process and believe in themselves again. That’s where real, lasting progress begins.

Tip: Share these wins with the tutor. It helps build a clearer picture of what’s working and keeps everyone motivated.

8.  How Enjoy Education Can Help

At Enjoy Education, we specialise in matching families with exceptional tutors who truly understand working with students with a wide range of SEN. Every child’s journey is different, and we make sure the support reflects that.

• One-to-one tuition at home or online
• Support from an industry leading network of SEN specialists 
• A bespoke match based on personality and learning style
• Ongoing advice and communication with parents